Here's a fun little quip!

So, this was a few months back.

My roommate and I live in Harlem, on one of the few un-gentrified streets left in NYC. There's definitely some interesting characters running amuck, including my favorite, our building's "security guard."

Now, my building is not nice, not new, and definitely not in need of being secured. But, somehow, this man (not really even sure if he lives in the building) has appointed himself the official security guard for our 150th street disaster. So, one day, my roommate and I were walking back from a day of 5 finger discount shopping or a random trip to Popeyes, when we spotted our "security guard." My roommate is also a singer, and was humming a tune, when he greeted us with an unusually friendly drunken tone. As my roommate was singing, he stopped us, and asked, "Hey you can sing, huh?"

Roommate: "Oh, well...yeah. ha."
Security Guard: "Oh you a super star, huh?"
Roommate: "Ha. Yea. Ha."
Security Guard: "Oh well, I can sing too ya know."
Roommate: "Oh yeah?"

Security Guard: "YEAH! HIT THIS! (including the finger wag gesture to the "accompanist.") HAAAAAAAAPPYYY BIRTHDAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY"

Now, this wasn't your typical "Happy Birthday." This was the most atonal, drunken, stuttering, hilarious happy birthday I had ever heard. And, of course, all we could do is laugh, shake our heads, and mosey into our protected building from our loving...security guard.

He kinda looks like this guy I took a pic of on the 3 train...

ps. Our security guard also told me that "around Christmastime I'm gonna have to give him a tip." Yeah, haven't done that yet.